it figures

i got a text from my dad this morning saying north texas was getting snow today! and that more than likely, tomorrow will be a white christmas. so enjoy the snow for us while we're in oregon!

MERRY CHRISTMAS! Santa comes tonight! I can't wait!!!

my heart is breaking for people i don't really know...

today the village church posted this on their website. i don't KNOW the chandlers, but my heart breaks for them. please continue to pray. as it says below, they're faced with a challenge, but "not as those without hope and perspective". from what i've seen, we have incredible leaders at this church....

Dear church,

In the first chapter of Philippians, the Apostle Paul writes that whatever imprisonments, beatings and trials he may have suffered, they all “serve to advance the gospel” of Jesus Christ. We implore you to keep the gospel of Christ as the main focus as we walk with Matt and Lauren through this trial.

On Tuesday, Dr. Barnett informed Matt and Lauren that the findings of the pathology report revealed a malignant brain tumor that was not encapsulated. The surgery to remove the tumor, the doctor said, was an extremely positive first step; however, because of the nature of the tumor, he was not able to remove all of it.

Matt, who is being released from the hospital today, is meeting with a neuro-oncologist this week to outline the next steps of the recovery process. There is a range of treatment possibilities but the exact course of action has not yet been determined. He will continue outpatient rehab.

The Lord is calling Matt and Lauren and The Village Church body to endure this trial. It will be a challenging road for Matt, his family and our church body. The gospel is our hope and the Lord is our strength. Matt and Lauren continue to find solace and hope in Christ. They weep facing this trial, but not as those without hope and perspective. The gospel clarifies their suffering and promises more of Christ through it all.

You have done a wonderful job respecting the family, and we ask that you continue to do this. They are processing all of this together and need you to give them precious space. Please do not visit them at their house unless personally invited by the Chandlers. The best way to serve the family is to continue to be faithful in prayer. Specifically, pray for the following:

Wisdom for all the coming decisions
Strength and peace to endure

The kids’ (Audrey, Reid and Norah) hearts; pray the Lord is merciful as they process and that their little hearts do not grow embittered
The Chandlers and The Village would suffer well because of the gospel and for the sake of Christ’s name
As you hurt and weep for the family, do not do it alone. Gather with your home group and with other believers in homes and pray together. This is a time to walk together with others and to endure this trial in community. If you wish, send cards and letters to Matt and Lauren at 2101 Justin Road, Flower Mound, TX 75028.

We will continue to keep you informed as new information is made available. Please be patient with the frequency of the updates. May God strengthen us all and may His glory shine brightly through this.

matt chandler

drew and i have been attending the village church for the past several months. it's much closer to our house and somewhere we already feel at home.

over thanksgiving, the preacher (i just can't call him a pastor...i grew up saying preacher...sorry. it's the church of christ in me!) had a seizure thanksgiving morning and was rushed to the hospital. they found a tumor in the frontal lobe of his brain and had scheduled a surgery for just one week later. after a 7 hour surgery friday, they had removed all of the tumor. matt was doing well and recovering in icu. they should find out this week from pathology if the tumor is cancerous.

this past weekend was the first weekend in the new building. the village church had bought an old albertson's building in flower mound and transformed it into their new building. very strange being there with no matt chandler to preach the first sunday, but it was still amazing.

before the sermon, they played a video of matt addressing the congregation. you should really watch this. what an amazing servant of the Lord. and i've also attached his latest blog entry on the church website. it's so comforting to have leaders at such peace and without any control over the situation. incredible to be this new to the church and able to see how the eldership/leaders deal with such a tough situation.

please keep matt chandler and his family in your prayers!

here's a link to the video...the blog post is below. http://hv.thevillagechurch.net/blog/hvpastor/

My Heart is Full....I am Thankful

The last seven days have been some of the most interesting of my life. I have felt anxiety, fear, sadness and a deep and unmovable joy simultaneously and in deeper ways than I have felt before. I am grateful for this heightened sense of things. Today at 10:45 a.m. CST I will have a good portion of my right frontal lobe removed. I head into that surgery with a heart that is filled with gratitude and hope.

Here are some of the things I am thankful for in no particular order:
I am thankful for the thousands of you who have prayed and fasted for my health. It has brought far more tears to Lauren’s and my eyes to receive this kind of attention from the Church universal than this tumor has.
I’m thankful for health insurance because I’m guessing they aren’t doing my five-hour surgery for free!
I am thankful that I have deep, real friendships at The Village with Michael Bleecker, Josh Patterson, Brian Miller, Chris Chavez and Beau Hughes. They have been such a comfort to me and my family this past week. Pastors should have good friends on their staff. It’s risky but worth the risk.
I am grateful for the men of God in my life, namely John Piper who taught me to hold my life cheap and to join with Paul in saying “I don’t count my life of any value or as precious to myself if only I might finish my course and complete the work that He gave me to do to testify to the Gospel of the grace of God. I’m nothing, I just have a job. God keep me faithful on the job and then let me drop and go to the reward.” Without this strong view of God’s sovereign will, I’m not sure how you don’t despair in circumstances like mine.
I am thankful for my wife Lauren. “Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ‘Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.’” “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”
I am thankful for my children. Audrey the Beautiful, Reid the Valiant and Norah the Joyous. Being a daddy to these three is one of the greatest joys of my life.
The privilege of seeing and appreciating all of life through the grid of a heightened sense of my own mortality.
I am thankful for brilliant doctors and surgeons who have been given a real gift by our great God and King to repair things as complex as the brain.
I am thankful for The Village Church. If there is a place that loves Jesus more, takes sanctification as seriously and wants to see the lost love the great King deeply I am unaware of it. These last seven years have been a spectacular joy!
More than anything else I am grateful to my King Eternal, my Lord Immortal, for my God invisible. He alone is God. All Glory and Honor, Forever to You O God. I am overwhelmed in these moments by God Himself and the assurance of a future inheritance of a Kingdom that cannot be shaken and where all things are made new (Hebrews 12).
Christ is All,
Matt Chandler

thanksgiving

some pictures...in reverse order since i can't figure out how to move pictures around. i know it seems like such a simple task, and it probably would be if someone could teach me how to maneuver a mac, but since i don't have such a person, you're going to see thanksgiving in reverse! HA!

the end of the busy week. we didn't hear her bouncing in her toy anymore, went to check on her, and found her completely passed out!

sitting with aunt burrito and noah. don't ask why she's aunt burrito. its a nickname i've called her for years and it just stuck.

all the cousins.

drew chasing after lana, but soon realizing maybe he shouldn't crawl under the table. she's just enough smaller than him that he can't quite make it through as gracefully...

lana lovin on her daddy. this week she showed us how she can give hugs. we had no idea that she grasped that concept. she gave noah hugs, isaac hugs...just about everyone. it was so adorable.

everyone gathering around to play uno moo...we had to see what all the hooplah on the commercials was about. gotta admit, VERY cute game.

thanksgiving day...lana staring out the window as drew, jimmy, isaac, and judah kicked around a soccer ball in the front yard.

noah just finishing up dinner. he's got such an easy going personality. and it's so neat that he and lana are close in age. they had a ball together. and what can i say? this little man is pretty stinkin handsome! :)

the three rowdy cousins...noahs the tame one.

deer in headlights. i've got nothing else.

well, we had a fun thanksgiving!

my sister and her family drove up from houston and stayed with us. it was so much fun having them in our house and finally getting to spend time with them. yes, they only live in houston, but 5 hours is a pretty long trek! we hadn't seen them since they moved at the beginning of august. so, we REALLY enjoyed the full house and the fun times.

the rest of the family came over thursday afternoon for a later thanksgiving meal. turkey courtesy of kroger, again. it was so yummy. no one in my family wants to deal with the turkey, and kroger just makes it so convenient....so they smoked the bird for us. we only had to fix the sides which was so nice. but somehow we were still cooking all day.

the meal was good...the family time was good...it was all around a good day. the only thing bad was that drew and i were down and out sick. we've both got (still) pretty bad colds...a cough that once you start, just doesn't allow you to quit, and more congestion than i knew any two people could have. other people weren't feeling well, either, but drew and i literally have slept for many many hours since getting sick. great hosts, huh? the funniest part of being sick...hearing your mom who does not drink nor does she condone it say "you should go get you some peach brandy or some whiskey and burn that stuff out of you"...oh yes, my friends. my mom was encouraging me to drink! ha! yah, i realize it was to burn the crud out of me, but it's still a little shocking to hear. but we obeyed...drew went to the liquor store..got some whiskey, and luckily my brother in law, jacob, knew how to make the hot tottie. boy did that sting. i think for a second i forgot it was alcohol, because i sure did take a huge swig thinking it was like the theraflu i'd been drinking. my face broke out in a sweat, my eyes were bright red, and of course, i started coughing! but the next few drinks i had learned my lesson. i gotta say, whiskey is some nasty stuff, but it sure does break up the congestion. drew and i both slept very well last night, were rested enough for family pictures today, and will probably do it again tonight in order to keep getting better. of course, this won't be a nightly thing. but i do believe i've found my cold remedy! thanks, mom!

so, today was a sad day. amber and her fam had to leave and head back to houston. but they'll be back for christmas! hooray!

any how...it's hot tottie time (sure hope we remember how to make it now that jacobs gone). and i have to be rested enough to go in to work tomorrow--holiday replenishment. fun times. so i'll close. hope you all had a super thanksgiving! yay for the cowboys!

family portraits

well, today we finally gave my parents their mothers & fathers day gifts. we all went and had family pictures made with my side of the family. i think they turned out super! i think the last time my family was in 1 picture together (besides my wedding) was when i was in 8th grade. and that dreaded picture hung on the wall in the hall of my parents house until it sold. the day didn't come soon enough that it came down! haha see, i had a mouth full of braces and the picture that my parents just HAD to pick (because my brother was finally smiling!) was the one where i was saying "french fries". so yes, braces and me making the "fr" face...fantastic. again, couldn't come down soon enough! haha

so today was my redemption. finally pictures that i will be proud to display in my house! and the most amazing part of it all, is that my parents still get along VERY well. so i was able to have a picture of my whole family...mom and dad both. what a blessing in such a messy situation!

so, i've attached some pictures from today's adventures. it was so much fun...very hot, and hard to keep the kids smiling, but we survived!

i'll write more on thanksgiving shortly....

the cousins....

the libby family

the faske family

the original 'mcdonald' family..sweet redemption!

the WHOLE family!

happy saturday!

the impossible job

i'm amazed every day by people who have clean homes and young children....AND work! how in the world do they do it? seriously...all i want for christmas is someone to clean my house for me. i'm talking, top to bottom. there are so many areas that have piled up and just need cleaned out. unfortunately, i think that's a job only drew and i can do. but i'll still take someone cleaning it after WE'VE cleaned it out! :)

lana is busy as ever. pulling up on any and everything...crawling all over the house...setting off the carbon monoxide monitor....and letting the dogs in when i've put them outside. yes. our back door doesn't latch, so all she has to do it push the door enough for the dogs to nudge their noses in, and it's all over. she nearly gets trampled! so, i'm going to start locking the door. baby-proofing, oh baby-proofing. i fear its a never ending thing.

today drew is at the marcus play off game. he's got a field pass for the game at the new cowboys stadium in arlington. i sure hope he gets some pictures to share!! other news on the drew front--basketball (middle school) starts monday. he's been pretty stressed this week with tryouts, placing kids on teams, and teaching some plays to get them started. tough only having 3 practices before your first game!

other news--we all had a serious stomach bug this week. lana went home sick wednesday, we had to keep her home thursday (daycare rules) so drew and i split the day, then friday we were all sick. lana was so great, though. she just played quietly and napped while drew and i were sick. what a blessing!

other than that, not a lot going on. my sister and her family come to visit next week for thanksgiving! we haven't seen them since they moved the last weekend in august. it's going to be a lot of fun and a FULL house! 5 more people and another dog to add to the mix! pictures to come!

and speaking of pictures, here are some we had done of lana! check them out! so adorable.

happy saturday!

halloween

bah! i was playing with my camera changing the date for daylight savings time ending, and somehow deleted all the pictures! argh! so now I have no pictures for you from the pumpkin parade from lana's daycare. but trust me, she was adorable.

here's a picture of her trial run!

i do, however, have pictures of my nephews on my side of the family! i'll show off corbin & bryson once i get some of those! :)

isaac, noah, & judah

noah at 5months (or right about)

adorable little pumpkin! you can tell he's lana's cousin!

isaac on the left and judah on the right. i know this has to do with star wars, but i really couldn't tell you anything beyond that. :)

Happy Halloween!

doorstop fun

well, lana has discovered the doorstop!

Drew and i went on our first date last night! bambi and richi took care of lana while we went to pf changs for dinner. it was so good! and drew and i had a lot of fun talking and not being interrupted by a baby. it had been way too long!

we've had a pretty slow week. just working and living our daily routine.

i finally bought babywise II so i've been reading that like crazy. i've learned a lot about lana's eating...and she's starting to eat a lot better! and now that we're getting her nice & full she's back to sleeping through the night. i had a brain malfunction--my pedi kept telling me that solids weren't a meal, but just getting them used to eating for later. well, yah, that's true, but it's also because liquid isn't enough anymore! when that finally clicked, i started feeding her more altogether and now we're golden. eating, sleeping...everyones happy!

so, i'll post more later. drew and i are watching football and the pizza is ready to eat!

happy sunday!

post for nana

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!

wedding weekend

well, i'm not doing so hot at keeping this thing updated. since i've become a single parent for the majority of the week (yes, football season is in full swing) i just don't have the time or energy to update anything! all of my social networking sites are severely deprived! no time for facebook or this blog, and I barely have time to check email. tough life, isn't it?

but if i'm gonna be this busy, i LOVE that it's with lana. we're having such a great time. and even more fun when drew gets home and plays with us!

last weekend we went to austin for a wedding. the last of drew's buddies from college got married. let me tell you, we were all beyond shocked to find out he was getting married. craig always was the one no one thought would get married....or at least not for a long time! but he seems to have found his perfect girl.

the wedding was in johnson city (outside of austin) on the ranch craig works at. he's the foreman, i think. the couple who owns the ranch made their money because the wife invented self-checkout! yes! i met the lady who invented self checkout, stayed in her million dollar ranch house, and it was incredible! we had such a great time! the house slept somewhere around 28 people. drew and i had a room ('the cowboy suite') and a crib for lana! i wish i would've got pictures of the ranch, but for some reason, i never thought to take any.

the weekend was pretty chilly. we had a cold front go through so the majority of the time the temps were in the upper 50s low 60s. way too cold for my liking! and poor lana wasn't dressed appropriately. that's another strike against me as a mom. i had no idea it was going to get and stay so cold. normally i'm on top of my weather, but lately...well, just refer back to paragraph #1 of this blog.

so, drew was in the wedding...it was ranch formal. they wore cowboy hats and boots. so as soon as i get more pictures of that, i'll post them. we even found lana some boots for under $5!!! i just wore black pants and a top, but i think we were all wishing we'd been in heavier clothing once the wind started blowing.

we got back sunday afternoon in time to change clothes and head to our FPU class. the class has been such a blessing to us. we're learning so much and are well on our way to living in financial peace!

this weekend was acu homecoming. we had every intention of going, but after being so busy the last few weekends, we decided we needed to relax and keep lana in some kind of stable atmosphere. good thing we did. the past few weeks/month her sleeping through the night has been sporadic at best. it's a combination of teething and being sick and maybe even her erratic napping schedule at daycare (they can't seem to keep her on my schedule...mainly because they believe in child directed napping/feeding and I DO NOT! a tangent for another day....)

but last night i put lana to bed around 745...i had dropped her mattress down to the lowest level, put the bumper back in (don't scream at me! i know it's a sleep hazard, but i figure if she can sleep with a blanket, she can manage to move her face out of the bumper and not suffocate!) and it was genius. i think because she can't see out of the slats in her crib, she was able to go back to sleep quicker. she didn't wake up once and slept for 11 hours! WOOHOO! so, both of her naps today we put her down awake and she went straight to sleep until we woke her up. again tonight, no crying when she went down. i pray this is a real solution to the waking up in the night problem...and i'm really enjoying not having to listen to her cry it out. that just breaks my heart.

anyhow. here are some pictures from the wedding.

lana and brady boozer

lana showing off her cowgirl boots

lana and drew...yes, that's a cowboy hat. if only i'd got a picture of the boots!

have a great weekend!

videos and more videos

you're gonna all have to bear with me....

we've got lots of cute little things to share with family, so you all get to see the videos too! some of them might not be as great in your opinion, but when you're the proud momma, grandparents, etc, they're all amazing! :) you'll have to pardon the cheesiness...i was playing around with iMovie and might've got a little carried away. this is what happens when a VERY non creative person gets ahold of "creative" programs....cheese! haha

this first one is lana eating...she's discovered that she doesn't need a wash rag! she'll 'lick em clean'!!

this one is kinda long. but she uses this bear/blanket to go to sleep...and gets so excited when we give it to her!!

and this last one is the best. this week she's started the army crawl! she scoots everywhere! we're having to keep an eye on her because she moves so fast! i'm NOT ready for this! but it's so much fun! :)

today drew is scouting in corsicana. that's 3 weekends in a row out of town for football. katy, waco, now corsicana. rough month!

today is my nephew, judah's 4th birthday! i really wanted to take a day trip with my mom and brother down to houston to celebrate, but knew lana wouldn't be able to handle 10 hours in the car. so i sent his gift with my mom and they're gonna eat some cake for us.

other than that, not a lot going on. we're staying extremely busy with life....still LOVING our financial peace university class. we're learning so much and i just love the concept of paying everything in cash. points, schmoints! we don't need stinkin credit cards! :) we don't have debt (unless you count school loans) but we just feel there's so much to learn! any tips we get i'll be glad to share!

hope you all have a super weekend! it's lana's nap time...therefore, its MY nap time!

weekend fun in waco!

well, this past weekend we took lana on her first trip out of the metroplex. and where did we choose to go? WACO! haha marcus was playing katy in football (like last year) and their game was in waco. so lana and i went along for the ride. it was actually my first time out of the metroplex since CHRISTMAS! i know. pathetic. i don't get out much! :(

but we had a fantastic time. the game was fun...met lots of people thanks to lana! and she got REALLY sunburned. that's another strike against me. not a good mom. i had a hat for her, but they wouldn't let me leave the stadium to go get it without buying another ticket to get back in. so, i tried to shelter her. by halftime, we moved to the shade. it was too late.

drew and i have started the financial peace university--dave ramsey--class. it's so fantastic. i think i'm having more fun than i should being on this budget. but maybe it's not being on the budget as much as being able to create one! i'm such a nerd. literally.

lana is back to normal. sleeping and eating very well. she was a little small for her 6 month appointment. she had been getting over a stomach bug, so she only weighed 13lbs. but she's probably back up to normal by now.

she's sitting up for short periods of time by herself; feeds herself from her bottle; and just has more of a personality these days. we're having so much fun with her! she's such a blessing to us!

oh! and we finally closed on our refinance! HOORAY!!!!!

no other news. lana is grabbing my arm, so clearly it's time to eat! here's a picture of lana in her new acu get up and one of her sunburn!

enjoy your week!

update

well, i think lana is still sick. she hadn't thrown up since friday morning...until now.

she hasn't been napping hardly at all....it's a fight to get her to fall asleep. she screams when we lay her down and just cries and cries. we try to let her cry it out, but how far are you supposed to take it when she's recovering from a sickness (or so we thought...maybe a relapse now). but drew and i are so exhausted! she wants to be held ALL the time...but doesn't want to be laying down on you. you can see how that makes it difficult to nap....

the diarrhea has stopped, so that's good. and she's still eating pretty well. she just refuses to take solids. we added formula to her bottle last night, so we're going to start adding it back in today too. she's been waking up 2x a night, and i'm sure a lot of that has to do with hunger...she's not eating enough because she doesn't feel well enough to eat like normal. i completely understand that.

she's also started this separation anxiety thing....if we walk out of the room, she starts wailing... which i'm sure in part is why she's having a hard time going to sleep. she's freaking out cause we're not in there. in her cries, you can hear how exhausted she is, but she just gets so upset about us leaving her that she can't go to sleep.

i feel like we're starting over. she had just started getting really good at solids...i'm talking a whole container of carrots in 15 minutes! and we were adding more and more formula to her bottle to wean her off milk, and she LOVED her crib...we could put her down wide awake and in 5 seconds, she's soothed herself and would be out for the night. all night.

i'm praying (with ALL of my heart) that this relapse is just because she's sick. please pray for little lana to get better and for our sanity! :)

on a lighter note, this weekend lana has learned to spit. how she figured this out, i have no clue. last night she and drew were going back and forth and it was hysterical. but of course, as soon as the camera came out, the game ended. i did get some video of her by herself, though. (but don't teach your kids this! we're gonna have a time teachin her that this is not ok! haha)

no bueno

our little lana has been so sick lately.

first of all, let me just give a disclaimer that this might be hard to follow...i want to update everyone on whats going on, but i'm not sure i can stay awake long enough to proof read! :)

moving on....

monday i kept her home because she started projectile vomiting at 430am! she soaked me twice! i put a call in to the doctor and they said to keep her home the rest of the day. so i did....and we went back to daycare/work tuesday. everything was fine. then tuesday night i noticed she had a killer diaper rash. no biggie. just throw a little desitin on there and we're good. nope. apparently the diarrhea from teething (and the stomach bug going around) was so acidic and so frequent, it started eating at the skin...and she was bleeding! who knew diaper rashes could get so bad! so, wednesday she was in so much pain from this bleeding diaper rash/possible yeast infection that the daycare made me take her home. she was inconsolable and wouldn't eat/sleep/play. she would only slightly calm down if she was being held (let me just throw in that it was NOT bleeding when i dropped her off...it got progressively worse. i'm not that terrible of a mom!!!). poor little lana. so i took her home around lunch time, loaded her up with lotrimin (anti-fungal cream--good for yeast infections on babies! who knew!), desitin, and baby powder. then i took her outside naked and we just aired her out! :) i think she enjoyed being naked, honestly. but we definitely don't want her to get used to that!

so today i took her back to daycare because her rash was significantly better. she did have a small bout of projectile vomiting last night that concerned me....it included dry-heaving into the sink. i swear, i've been a wreck all week just watching my little girl be so sick! it's terrible. but, we took her to daycare today and i was able to go back to work. until....lunch time. projectile vomiting back. she soaked the teacher, her crib, and her clothes (let me also bring up that by the time i get to daycare every morning, she's blown out her diaper and needs to be changed into a new outfit. so this was her third outfit for the day.) they gave me an illness report which means she can't go back to daycare tomorrow. what in the world. i was out monday, 1/2 day wednesday, 1/2 day thursday, and now she can't go in friday either? talk about an unproductive week! drew is going to go to practice in the morning, he's got a sub from 9-3, so he'll be home with her and i'll go to work. and then i'll be back in time for him to get to afternoon practice and scouting. this is tough. the worst part is that i have NO vacation thanks to maternity leave. none at all. and when lana is sick, that's a vacation day...not a sick day. ugh. pray for lana. i just want her to get better. you can tell she doesn't feel well, and that's just sad to see her not her smiley self.

after i got her home today, i fed her some pedialyte and we took a long nap. she hasn't thrown up or anything since we've been home. she's had 1 messy diaper, but looks like she might be getting better. the pediatrician (who i've spoken to MANY times this week!) said there was a nasty stomach bug going around...apparently lana got it. the twins in her class had it about a week ago, so i guess i should've been expecting it. looks like lana's got my sickly genes for now...i was hoping she'd just naturally be born with drew's super human immune system. no such luck. maybe she'll still develop it!

so, this weekend we were going to either head to houston to visit my sister or just kinda get away from home, but stay close (staycation). well, neither is going to happen now! sick baby, diaper rash from heck, and drew and i are just flat out pooped. we're both extremely stressed out and overwhelmed with work. so, pray that we're able to find some peace this weekend and get caught up to start next week fresh.

lana turned 6 months on the 1st, so next wednesday is shots day! pray for that too! i hope she's better in time to get those shots!

hope you all have a super holiday/long weekend!

struggles

i've kinda decided, at the risk of sounding very skeptical and pessimistic, that people just can't be trusted. it doesn't matter how long or even how short you've known someone...you just can't really trust them. i try my hardest to not give people a reason to say anything about me behind my back, but somehow it still happens. and my faith in people decreases. this shouldn't be a surprise to me, though. we're a fallen people. we're not perfect--and even though people claim to be christians, they're clearly not holding themselves to the same standard. and it still hurts my feelings. i think i'm going to try EXTRA hard this week to stop people from gossiping around me. not cool, kids. not cool.

secondly, i'm having a very hard time at work. unfortunately, we've entered the realm of "drew is no longer available--please check back in march". it's a tough time of year for him, and i feel terrible that work wears him out like this. so be saying prayers for drew. he can always use them!

the problem i'm having at work is that i don't have enough time in my day to get things accomplished that i need to. the daycare opens at 7am...and if i wanted to be there to drop lana off at 7 so i could be at my desk and working by 720, i'd have to be up at 5am every day. i'm definitely NOT a morning person, but i guess this could be done. poor lana would have to move her wake up time up to 545-6am and her bed time up to 730-8pm. which i guess is ok. (but would be horrible on the weekends getting up before 6am! ugh!) i have to be on my way down to the daycare at 515 to make sure i get lana out of there by 530. you might be thinking....what? it takes 15 minutes to get to the daycare INSIDE YOUR BUILDING??? people, JCP is huge. and huge doesn't even capture it's hugeness. it's a quarter of a mile from one side of the building to the next, and while that doesn't sound very far, it may as well be a MILE in heels! :)

so my struggle is that i've been losing about 2 hours of work every day since i started back in may. i used to come in at 730 and leave around 6. Now, i get to my desk around 8, leave by 515, and since I'm still nursing, i have 1 hour a day i spend walking down to the clinic to pump (sorry for all the information...i'm sure you were just DYING to know that!) Most days i eat lunch at my desk to get an hour back, but somehow I'm still always behind. I feel like people are having to pick up my slack at work, and that's not something i take lightly. i'm a very independent person who doesn't like asking for help. i'd rather work all night so i don't bother other people with having to do my stuff. i'm definitely being taught a lesson here. not only that, but something happened to my brain after lana was born. i'm not kidding. it really doesn't work. i can't think straight and i sure am NOT as smart as i used to be. this is not a joke. but a real struggle for me at work. you can laugh, but seriously, pray about it too!

but i feel like people are starting to get annoyed. for example, yesterday the daycare called me to come get lana...she was sick and they wanted me to take her to the doctor before she got any worse. we had already been out monday and tuesday due to me being sick, and then i had to leave early friday because lana was sick. really? i worked 2 1/2 days last week? how in the HECK am i supposed to get my work done in 2 1/2 days when i'm struggling to get everything accomplished in 45 hours a week? so i can definitely tell it's grating on people's nerves that I have to be out.

but what am i supposed to do? really, what? do you really think i'll get things accomplished if i were to bring lana back up to my desk to finish working? do you think anyone else would get anything done with a screaming baby nearby? i'm just at a loss for what to do. these are not circumstances i have control over--getting sick, having a sick baby.... i have no clue how in the world i'm supposed to be able to do my job (and do it well, because we're supposed to serve our bosses as if we were serving the Lord.... something i still need to work on). but lately, i can feel myself getting frustrated at drew. why is it that he doesn't have to just cut meetings off because the daycare is closing. why is it my job that always has to suffer? why do i have to look like the slacker? but it's not his fault. the daycare is at my work. this is something we've talked through many times, and even before lana was born. i insisted it would be fine. but i can feel this frustration bubbling up in me and it's hard to not lash out in anger.

so please be in prayer over us. i'm not sure what to do. i dont know if God is trying to show me a different path and i keep missing it, or if He's trying to toughen me up a little. i honestly wouldn't mind just working at a no brainer job so i could leave at 5pm every day (or maybe 430). of course my paycheck would suffer tremendously, but i'd still be contributing something! i guess that's the point. life focus has shifted. it shouldn't be on a career for now, but on family. i've had this desire to do the financial peace university for a few years now, and thanks to kim & scott doing it, i think drew is on board too. maybe this will be our way to get finances in order (paying off dreaded school loans) in order for me to cut back work hours and really be able to raise lana. for fear of going off on another rambling tangent, i'll spare you the "i don't want daycare raising my daughter" sermon. if you've read my blog for a while, or know me at all, you know i am not in favor of daycare at all. moving on.

so, i know this is a bomb of a post...and a side of me i don't really like to show all that often. i've struggled a lot since starting back to work. and i know if there was anything drew could do to allow me to stay home, or to make this easier on me, he would. it hurts him to see me so upset about this stuff. but i don't want him to switch jobs. he LOVES what he does. and he's so good at it. he has found his calling and he needs to stay there. see, i just don't know what the answer is. pray for us to have open hearts, ears, minds, everything so we can figure this out. and pray for our sick little lana! i hear her now, so i'll end.

have a super saturday! the weekends are so precious!

PRAISE!

my sister got a job today! teaching 2nd grade in the same school district her hubby is working in! and she starts TOMORROW!!!! pray that they find a daycare, and FAST!

swimmin in the hippo

since drew and i don't have a pool, we have the second best thing...a hippo.

here are some pictures of lana going "swimming" for the first time! she seemed a little unsure about the water shooting out at her at first, but eventually we got a big smile. and of course, she loved her swimsuit & sunglasses! she told me so. :)

the hippo

Drew & Lana

tastin the water...mmmmm

lovin it!

all by herself...barely




also, she is officially getting her first tooth. we thought she was a few months ago, but there's no mistaking it this time! you can feel the jagged ridges breaking through the skin. our little lana is being a trooper though! the only reason i found out is because i periodically check her mouth. this time we had a surprise! so, we're praying for her because it's gotta be uncomfortable!

drew started back to work last week...coaches meetings. this week he starts 2 a days. boo. it's way too hot for that, in my opinion. but he starts scouting either this week or next. and so it begins. more to come!

things

you know, my previous post title is so incorrect.....let me update you.

i've come up with a few things you should NOT do at one time....from experience. individually, fine. all at once, no bueno. say a prayer for us. things are a little hectic around here!

1. have a brand new baby (and oh do we love her!!!!)

2. refinance your house (started this process in march...still no closing date set thanks to people quitting their jobs and our paperwork just hanging out on desks for weeks. thanks, bank of america, for letting us know there was an issue with personnel.)

3. replace the roof and fence thanks to major storm damage (which causes a second appraisal to have to happen!)

4. sell your truck (living with one vehicle is hard! even if it's only for a week!)

5. purchase a new truck...in oregon...from family who is patiently waiting for your house to close so you can get your truck loan!!!

it doesn't look like much when i write it down, but oh boy! have we been busy and slightly stressed lately. do you think we might've taken on too much? maybe, just maybe....

not much...

going on around here. we had family in town last week! it was such a blessing to have drew's sister, her husband, and their two kiddos in to visit. we went to six flags on friday, rested saturday, shopped in southlake sunday, and ran errands/rested monday. the visit was WAY too short. we very so happy to have them at our home for once, and for them to meet lana. we have a few shots of the cousins together!

bryson and lana at life's a beach

bryson, corbin & lana...cousins on the libby side

but last weekend was also sad. my sister moved to houston. my brother in law finally got a job down there, so they had only a few weeks to pack up their whole house and move. it's bitter sweet. we'd all been praying for jacob to get out of Dallas ISD. but now we need to pray that my sister finds a job down there! if you're in houston and know of openings, let me know!!!

isaac, judah, lana, & noah...cousins on the mac side

pictures are out of order, but here's kim, scott, bryson & corbin at six flags!

tuesday we're having more company! drew's parents are flying in to spend some time with lana...and us too! haha it'll be a treat to have them here again.

here are a few things about lana lately:

--she's a rolling machine! it takes only a matter of seconds for her to be on her stomach!

--she likes to turn the pages of her books! and really looks at the pictures!

--she's still sleeping like a champ! which makes drew and me VERY happy! we had a few problems at 4months, but we worked through those by adding calories to her diet!

--she's loving her dogs! she gets a kick out of toketee...just tugs on her ears and laughs

--she's full of smiles...can't help but smile when she's smiling all the time!

--she LOVES her daddy! drew's been able to keep her home quite a bit this summer, so they were able to get some good father/daughter bonding time.

well, i hear her waking up from her nap! more to come!

anniversary

i couldn't let today end without acknowledging how special it is! today is the anniversary of finding out i was pregnant! i'm not going to go into all the details of the day, because honestly, july 10, 2008 was the scariest day of my life. a year later, i couldn't be more happy (well, i could if i wasn't working! HA!) but really. I was terrified of becoming a mom. i thought i would have kids MUCH later in life. that was my plan, anyway. who knew that God had a different one?! doesn't he always? :) but i'm so thrilled with how things have turned out. funny how i can't even imagine how life was pre-lana. i don't know what i'd be doing right now if she weren't here. she's such a blessing to me. and such a welcomed surprise.

so, thank you, Lord, for surprises! and for having plans that don't coincide with ours! drew and i are so lucky!

4 months

well, drew's playing golf today, and we're down to only 1 vehicle (we sold drew's truck), so that means i'm confined to the house today! lucky for you, i've actually got time to update the blog! :)

wednesday was lana's 4 month birthday. she got her shots and it was terrible just like the 2month ones. i'm not looking forward to 6months. BOO! but she weighs 12lbs exactly and is 23 3/4 inches long. about the 25th % for both. we have a little girl! but the doc said we could start introducing solid foods, so we did! last night before fireworks we got some cereal and had lana try it out. i don't think she was completely sold on it. i don't blame her. it smelled like baby vomit. :)

4th of july....well, we thought it was gonna be super! flower mound was setting of fire works at flower mound high school. we're probably no more than 1 mile from the school so we thought we'd watch them from our front yard. i'm not quite sure why, but we didn't see anything. we heard a lot and saw flashes of colors between the tree branches across the street, but no "fireworks". bummer. last year we watched them in hawaii and the year before was in boston. let's just say i was VERY disappointed. poor lana. maybe next year.

last night we also went to church with some friends of ours who attend the village. the first time drew and i went we weren't very impressed. i think maybe the sermon was too simplistic. but last night was great. their minister is an ACU alumni so we're partial! haha but the sermon was super and it was great to worship with friends who don't go to the same church as us.

say a little prayer for me...i'm still really struggling with this working mom thing. i know it's really hard on drew to see how hard it is on me. lana's schedule is so jacked up thanks to daycare, she's decided to start getting up at 5am, i'm fearing that we're gonna have to supplement with formula due to low production (work/stress/time)....i'm just really not handling this very well right now. so just keep me/drew/lana in your prayers.

other than that, not a lot going on! here are some pictures!

waitin to see why she was in her new chair!

oh, mom! this can't be edible!

hmmm....can't decide what to think.

this is how i found lana saturday morning. she sleeps like her cousin, corbin!

and sometimes she breaks free of her blanket...this was during nap time

hope you all have a super sunday!

pictures!

no words, just pictures!

lana taking a ride on toketee

last weekend drew and i went on a staycation at the hilton in southlake for our anniversary. we had such a great time. crazy how you can be 20 minutes from home and still feel like you're on vacation! we ate at the cheesecake factory for our anniversary dinner. this is me and lana waiting for our table!

drew and lana get quite a bit of play time now that he's off for the summer!

here's a picture of lana before going to 'school'! the pants are still a little big, but too cute! thanks, nana, for the outfit! it finally starting to fit!

more to come! hope you all have a super weekend! I apologize for the delay in updates!